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David Pinsof17 August 2023

How To Leverage The Psychology Of Power & Status - David Pinsof - #668

2Frameworks
13Insights

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Frameworks in this episode

Insights & moments

The myth-busts, hot takes, explainers, and tools worth keeping.

Myth Buster· 1

Myth Buster

Happiness is bullshit: it's a prediction error, not a goal

Pinsof argues evolution wouldn't program us to want a feeling inside our heads — it programs us to want real-world things like food, sex, and status. Happiness, in his theory, is a prediction error: the signal your brain fires when something turns out better than expected, prompting it to recalibrate and pursue more of that thing. It's a 'getting warmer' cue in a guessing game, not the prize — and something intrinsically unexpected is impossible to pursue, like planning your own surprise party.

  • Evolution wires us to want real things, not internal states
  • Happiness = the brain recalibrating on a better-than-expected outcome
  • It's a directional cue, not the goal itself
  • Pursuing happiness directly is self-defeating and can breed misery

Pursuing happiness is like planning your own surprise party, right? You can't do it.

David Pinsof

What happiness is is your brain recalibrating itself in light of an unexpectedly good outcome.

David Pinsof
#happiness#evolutionary-psychology#well-being

Hot Take· 1

Hot Take

Some bullshit is better than other bullshit

To critics who say honor, truth, and altruism are axiomatically good, Pinsof concedes sympathy: calling sacred values bullshit doesn't make them bad. Science is bathed in bullshit values of disinterested truth-seeking, yet the institution needs them to uncover real truths. The point isn't to discard sacred values but to choose the status games whose bullshit produces the best outcomes.

  • Sacred values being bullshit doesn't make them harmful
  • Science needs its bullshit values to function
  • Social change means changing what earns status
  • Choose the games with the best downstream results

If we want to create a better world, there's no way to do that other than by changing the social norms, which ultimately means changing…

David Pinsof
#status#ethics#social-change

Explainer· 9

Explainer

Why 'everything is bullshit': we don't know our own reasons

Pinsof argues most of what we say is bullshit for two reasons: we don't have real access to why we do things, and we're even more in the dark about why others act. Since most conversation ultimately concerns those reasons, most talk is truth-free. What we call introspection is really a self-flattering story that makes us look competent, rational, and virtuous.

  • We lack real access to our own underlying motivations
  • We're equally or more mistaken about others' motives
  • Most conversation is about reasons for behavior
  • Explanations are self-flattering stories, not truths

What we're really doing when we're explaining why we do things is we're coming up with a nice sounding self-flattering story.

David Pinsof
#self-knowledge#introspection#psychology
Explainer

Bullshitting vs lying: the difference is caring about truth

Lying is deliberately misrepresenting a truth you know. Bullshitting is communicating with total indifference to truth — you're pursuing a social goal like looking good or winning a negotiation, and truth is irrelevant. You may occasionally say true things, but only by accident when truth happens to serve the goal.

  • Lying: you know the truth and say otherwise
  • Bullshitting: truth is simply not your concern
  • The real goal is social — status, persuasion, a better deal
  • Any truth told is incidental, not by design

You might kind of close your eyes, throw the dart, and it hits the bullseye on the truth dartboard.

David Pinsof
#truth#communication#deception
Explainer

The status-game paradox: thinking about the game destroys it

You can't play a status game while being aware it's a status game, because awareness reveals you're a status-seeker — and we don't reward status-seekers. This gives every status game an inherent fragility: the secret that everyone is competing for status cannot get out, or the whole game collapses and everyone loses their accumulated standing.

  • Awareness of the game exposes you as a status-seeker
  • Wanting status is itself a cue of low status
  • The shared secret keeps the game running
  • Exposure threatens everyone's accumulated status at once

We cannot play a status game if we're all aware that it's a status game.

David Pinsof
#status#self-deception#social-dynamics
Explainer

Why we instinctively dislike status-seekers

We read overt status-seekers as selfish (prioritizing their climb over others), as probably low-status (wanting it implies not having it), and as disingenuous, manipulative, and willing to backstab. Each read lowers their status, which is exactly why the desire for status must stay hidden.

  • Seen as selfish — their climb over others' welfare
  • Seen as low-status — wanting implies lacking
  • Seen as manipulative and untrustworthy
  • Being perceived as a seeker lowers your status

We pretend we don't care about status as a way of gaining status.

David Pinsof
#status#reputation#social-perception
Explainer

Social media is an alien environment for status psychology

Our status instincts evolved for small hunter-gatherer groups of a few people. Social media breaks that in two ways: a single post can reach thousands or millions, massively raising reputational stakes, and everything is permanent. In ancestral life, fuzzy memory left room to negotiate what you said; on the record, words are set in stone and can't be wiggled out of.

  • Ancestral socializing was a handful of people at a time
  • Mass reach inflates reputational consequences
  • Permanence removes ambiguity and deniability
  • Our psychology isn't equipped for either

Where we have computers recording it, all of a sudden that makes our words like set in stone and undeniable.

David Pinsof
#social-media#evolutionary-psychology#reputation
Explainer

Sacred values are cover stories that keep status games from collapsing

Sacred values — authenticity, justice, equality, honor, knowledge — are shared narratives about the noble reasons we do things. Their job is to appear as the opposite of status: high-minded, altruistic, larger than ourselves. By keeping the game as far from 'status' as possible, they stop it being recognized as a status game and let it stay stable for years. Every cult and tight-knit group bathes its hierarchy in sacredness.

  • Sacred values are altruistic-sounding cover stories
  • They must appear as the opposite of petty status
  • This lets a status game run without being recognized
  • Cults and tribes saturate their hierarchies in sacredness

Their status hierarchies are bathed in sacredness... it's not even a status hierarchy, it's a justified great chain of being.

David Pinsof
#status#ideology#group-dynamics
Explainer

Meaning is long-term fitness value

Pinsof reframes meaning in evolutionary terms: pleasure maximizes fitness in the short run (food in your mouth now), while meaning maximizes it over the long run through effort and persistence. Raising a child, building a tribe, or cultivating a valuable skill pays off only over years and may hurt in the short term — and meaning is what lets you weather those storms and keep your eyes on the long-term prize.

  • Pleasure = short-run fitness; meaning = long-run fitness
  • Meaningful projects require years of effort and patience
  • They can cause short-term pain (a child can be a pain)
  • Meaning helps you endure the storms toward the payoff

What meaning does is it helps me weather those storms... and keep my eyes on the prize of the long-term goal.

David Pinsof
#meaning#evolutionary-psychology#parenting
Explainer

The human brain evolved for gossip, not tools

Pinsof rejects the story that our big brains are for tool-making and conquering nature. Brains are huge because our groups are huge and need navigating. The brain is a social organ built for gossiping, politicking, rule-following, covert rule-breaking, rationalizing, and self-deception — 'homo hypocritus,' in Robin Hanson's phrase. Reflect on what you actually think about all day and it's overwhelmingly people, not carburetors.

  • Big brains track big social groups, not tool use
  • The brain's real work is gossip, politics, and rationalization
  • Robin Hanson's 'homo hypocritus'
  • Your thoughts are mostly about people, not practical tasks

The reason why our brains are so huge is because our groups are so huge and we need to navigate those groups.

David Pinsof
#evolutionary-psychology#social-brain#cognition
Explainer

Why we're drawn to vast landscapes and open views

Pinsof endorses an evolutionary account of our preference for sweeping vistas over messy thickets. High ground and open views gave ancestors strategic advantage over invaders and made navigation easier — like having a map laid out. Getting lost was a lethal selection pressure, so we're drawn to legible places with clear landmarks, visible water, and known hiding and camping spots.

  • Preference for open vistas over cluttered scenes
  • High ground = strategic advantage over invaders
  • Open views make navigation easy, like a map
  • Getting lost was a deadly selection pressure

Getting lost was a major selection pressure for our ancestors. You know, if you got lost, you're dead.

David Pinsof
#evolutionary-psychology#nature#aesthetics

Takeaway· 2

Takeaway

Pursue peace of mind and meaning — the 'what would tomorrow-me want' reframe

Williamson offers peace of mind and meaning as more scalable pursuits than happiness: peace of mind makes every other experience tolerable, and meaning is doing what tomorrow-you would have wanted today-you to do. When tempted — a diet, an affair — asking 'what would me-tomorrow want me to do?' creates distance and projects you into the future. Without peace of mind even a lavish life feels bad; without meaning you'll feel ashamed on reflection.

  • Peace of mind facilitates every other good experience
  • Meaning = acting as your future self would want
  • 'What would tomorrow-me want?' adds distance to hard choices
  • A lavish life without peace of mind still feels miserable

Meaning is doing the thing which you tomorrow would have wanted you to do.

Chris Williamson
#meaning#well-being#decision-making
Takeaway

'Interesting' content is overrated — seek boring truths and real people

What we find interesting, Pinsof argues, is whatever serves our unflattering social goals: attention-grabbing gore and sex, contrarian beliefs that let us look smart, moral takes that make rivals look bad, and news everyone's discussing so we're not left out. Most truly useful truth is old and boring. Chasing 'interesting' fuels an intellectual status game that deepens loneliness, pulling us toward interesting virtual friends over the real people who offer companionship.

  • We find interesting what serves hidden social motives
  • Counterintuitive and moralized beliefs win status
  • Most useful truth is old and boring
  • Chasing interesting people breeds loneliness over real bonds

We're more interested in being part of the conversation that people are having than we are at finding useful truths.

David Pinsof
#attention#status#loneliness