Setback Alchemy
Turn every failure into fuel by owning your part in it
- Difficulty
- Moderate
- Time to result
- ~ongoing to results
- Steps
- 4
- Confidence
- 60%
Joe Santagato and Chris Williamson describe a repeatable way to metabolize failure. When something bad happens, the instinct is to get angry at the other person because it lets you hide from your own responsibility. Instead, you deliberately ask what your involvement was — not to absolve the other party, but because your own behavior is the only thing you can control and therefore learn from. Chris names this 'alchemy': turning something useless and shitty into something valuable. Because the bad thing has already happened, refusing to reflect only wastes it. Creatively, this means hunting for the specific reason a project failed so you can improve, treating each slammed door as a narrowing of options that moves you closer to what works.
Origin
Emerged in dialogue between Joe Santagato and Chris Williamson while discussing failed scripts, being cheated on, and creative rejection; Chris supplies the 'alchemy' framing, Joe the radical self-responsibility.
Core principles
- 01Blaming others lets you hide from your own involvement
- 02Taking responsibility is the only lever you actually control
- 03Every bad situation already happened, so you may as well extract value
- 04A closed door narrows your options, which is progress not loss
- 05Admitting you're wrong is the only reliable engine of growth
How to run it
- 1
Catch the blame reflex
Notice the urge to get angry at the other person or call them the problem. That anger is a hiding place that gives you distance from your own responsibility.
Watch out Don't swing to the opposite extreme of pure self-blame; the goal is honest accounting, not punishment.
- 2
Ask what your involvement was
Even when the other party was clearly wrong, ask what part you played — red flags ignored, advice unheeded, a role you contributed. This is the only part you can act on.
Pro tip Owning your part doesn't mean you're a bad person; it means you have something to learn.
- 3
Extract the specific lesson
For creative failures, seek the concrete reason it didn't work rather than defending the thing. Ask collaborators why it's bad and actually listen.
Pro tip Joe treats detailed criticism as exciting because it's proof of progress toward getting it right.
Watch out If you defend the work instead of diagnosing it, you'll repeat the same mistake.
- 4
Accept the closed door and move
A failure eliminates one option, leaving fewer doors and a clearer path. Take the lesson, turn around, and try the next door instead of clutching the shut one.
In the wild
Joe wrote a script that friends and family praised. He sent it to his collaborator Greg, who returned roughly eight pages on why it sucked. Rather than get defensive, Joe read every point and found they made sense — which he found exciting because it meant he was making progress.
→ The willingness to be wrong became the basis of a lasting creative partnership and better work.
Using being cheated on as an example, Joe argues that even while not absolving the other person, you can still ask what your involvement was — maybe you were predictable, maybe you picked wrong. Admitting 'that's something that happened to me' lets you learn without having to change if you don't want to.
→ Converts a purely painful event into a usable insight instead of a permanent grievance.
Common mistakes
Getting angry to avoid reflection
Defaulting to 'that person is messed up' gives you distance from where you could have been responsible, and hides the mistake you also made.
Defending the work instead of diagnosing it
Insisting your script or project is already good stops you finding the real reason it failed, so you keep repeating the same mistake.
Is it for you?
Best for
Anyone processing rejection, a failed project, or a painful relationship who wants to convert it into growth.
Not ideal for
Situations of genuine abuse where 'what was my involvement' becomes self-blame; the method assumes ordinary setbacks, not victimization.
From the transcript
“The only way to grow is to constantly admit when you're wrong... I try to take responsibility for everything that goes wrong in my life.”
“The word that's coming to mind as you say it? Alchemy. Like turning something that's kind of useless and shitty into something that's really valuable.”
“when you get your ass whooped... it's good because you just closed a possible door and now you have less doors to choose from.”
From the episode
The Art of Unstoppable Self-Belief - Joe Santagato - #1108
Joe Santagato