MModern Wisdom
← All frameworks
Self-MasteryAyelet Fishbach

Set Approach Goals That Feel Good

Frame goals as inspiring destinations you move toward, not chores you avoid

Difficulty
Moderate
Time to result
~weeks to results
Steps
6
Confidence
78%

Fishbach's research finds the single best predictor of sticking to a goal is intrinsic motivation: how good the pursuit feels in the moment, not the payoff at the end. Because most meaningful goals are only slightly intrinsically rewarding, the method is to squeeze out that small edge and keep it fresh. Start with a genuine long-term goal, then engineer the framing so pursuit feels good: convert avoidance goals ('stop looking at my phone') into approach goals ('read a book before sleep'), because avoidance goals feel like chores and trigger the very behavior you're suppressing. Frame the goal as an exciting destination rather than a dull means, add a concrete target, and build in a little enjoyment. Since what feels good changes day to day, you constantly re-tune the activity to keep it rewarding.

Origin

Developed by University of Chicago behavioral scientist Ayelet Fishbach across decades of motivation research, including work with Caitlin Woolley at Cornell, and summarized in her book Get It Done.

Core principles

  • 01You need a real goal first, but the goal alone is never enough.
  • 02What predicts sticking is how good the pursuit feels in the moment.
  • 03Approach goals ('do X instead') beat avoidance goals ('don't do X').
  • 04Define the goal as the destination, not the means of getting there.
  • 05Even a little intrinsic reward matters a lot, and it must be refreshed.

How to run it

  1. 1

    Start with a genuine goal

    Pick a real long-term destination you care about, since without a goal you never set the resolution in the first place. Extrinsic, long-term goal-drive also predicts whether you'll set another goal next year.

    Pro tip Keep the goal, but don't expect it to carry you alone; treat it as the starting point.

  2. 2

    Convert avoidance into approach

    Rewrite any 'don't do X' goal as 'do Y instead.' Instead of 'don't look at my phone before bed,' set 'read a book before I fall asleep.'

    Pro tip For habits like smoking, find something you can put in place of the behavior in the same trigger situation.

    Watch out Avoidance goals fail because checking whether you're avoiding the thing brings it right back to mind, like being told not to think of a white bear.

  3. 3

    Frame the goal as the destination

    State the goal as the thing itself, not the path to it: 'get the job' beats 'apply for a job,' 'buy a house' beats 'save for a house.' The destination is exciting; the means feels like a cost.

    Pro tip Keep it abstract enough to inspire while still pointing at a real target.

    Watch out Framing goals as the means (studying, applying, saving) drains motivation because people don't want to invest in means.

  4. 4

    Add a concrete target

    Give the goal a specific, measurable target: 'exercise three times this week' or 'finish this project by month-end' rather than 'work out more' or 'be successful at work.'

    Pro tip Match the target to your incentives so hitting it actually serves the underlying goal.

  5. 5

    Engineer a little intrinsic reward

    Build something enjoyable into the activity itself. In the math study, kids worked with music and colorful pencils, which made them stick with it longer even though the boost was small.

    Pro tip You only need a small edge of enjoyment; a slight increase in fun produces disproportionate persistence.

  6. 6

    Refresh what feels good

    What was enjoyable yesterday may bore you today, or the weather changes and the outdoor workout no longer appeals. Keep adjusting how you pursue the goal so it stays rewarding.

    Pro tip Periodically ask 'is this still fun for me right now?' and swap the activity if the answer is no.

In the wild

Making math intrinsically motivating

In research with Caitlin Woolley at Cornell, Fishbach made math more enjoyable for kids by letting them work while listening to music and using colorful pencils. The class didn't become deeply fun, only slightly more intrinsically motivating than usual. Even so, the small boost meant the children stuck with the work longer.

A small increase in in-the-moment enjoyment produced meaningfully longer persistence.

Phone-at-bedtime reframed

Someone who uses their phone too much before bed sets an avoidance goal: 'stop looking at my phone at night.' Fishbach reframes it as an approach goal tied to the same trigger situation: 'read a book before I fall asleep.' The new goal names something to do instead, so it doesn't require constantly checking whether you're avoiding the phone.

The approach-framed goal is far more likely to actually happen and makes you forget the phone.

Common mistakes

Setting avoidance goals

Goals framed as 'don't do X' feel like chores and backfire, because monitoring your success means repeatedly bringing the forbidden behavior to mind.

Framing the goal as the means

Defining the goal as studying, applying, or saving kills motivation; people invest far more in the destination itself than in the path to it.

Leaving the goal vague

'Work out more' or 'be successful' gives you nothing to aim at; a concrete target like 'three times this week' is far more motivating.

Is it for you?

Best for

Anyone setting a health, fitness, finance, or habit goal they don't naturally enjoy doing.

Not ideal for

One-off tasks like a single medical checkup that you can just do whether or not it's fun.

From the transcript

what predicts is how much it feels good at the moment that you pursue that resolution

Ayelet Fishbach · 02:00

do or approach goals work better than do not goals because do not goals feel like a chore

Ayelet Fishbach · 15:00

just define your goal in terms of the the thing itself not the way there

Ayelet Fishbach · 61:30

From the episode

The Psychology Of Human Motivation - Ayelet Fishbach - #447

Ayelet Fishbach