Getting to 'That's Right'
Summarize the other side's view until they say 'that's right'
- Difficulty
- Moderate
- Time to result
- ~weeks to results
- Steps
- 5
- Confidence
- 90%
The most powerful move in Voss's system is to articulate the other side's point of view so accurately that they say 'that's right' — meaning 'you've got it exactly.' You collect their full perspective, including the over-justifications people always pile on ('your aunt Millie wore the wrong socks'), and feed all of it back without arguing a single point. A significant share of deals then make themselves in your favor once you earn that 'that's right.' Just as important, the act of thoughtfully expressing the other side's perspective levels you out — it pulls you out of anger, which is poison you're drinking yourself. Voss can't guarantee the deal closes, but he guarantees you'll always be better off after the summary than before it, if only because it steadies you.
Origin
Drawn from Chris Voss's FBI hostage-negotiation career, including a Philippines kidnapping case he coached, and his book Never Split the Difference.
Core principles
- 01Articulating the other side's view so they say 'that's right' is the single biggest game-changer
- 02People over-justify, so feed the justification back without arguing any of it
- 03A summary levels you out and pulls you out of anger
- 04You are always better off after summarizing than before, even when the deal doesn't close
How to run it
- 1
Collect their full perspective
Gather everything the other side is claiming, including all the justifications and grievances behind their position.
Pro tip People always over-justify, so expect a lot of material to work with.
- 2
Assemble a complete summary
Build a thorough summary of their point of view. In hard cases the full summary can be long and feel excruciating to deliver.
- 3
Feed it all back without arguing
Repeat their perspective and justifications back to them, including the ridiculous parts. Do not argue with any of it.
Watch out The moment you argue a point you break the summary and lose the 'that's right.'
- 4
Wait for 'that's right'
Deliver the summary and let them confirm it with 'that's right' — the sign they feel fully understood.
Pro tip Don't mistake a dismissive 'you're right' for the real prize; 'that's right' is the game-changer.
- 5
Bank the leveling-out effect
Even if the deal doesn't close, notice that summarizing has pulled you out of anger and steadied you, which is good for you physically and strategically.
Pro tip You're always better off after the summary than before — that alone makes it worth doing.
In the wild
Stalemated for months on outrageous ransom demands, Voss coached his negotiator to summarize the kidnapper's own justification back to him — that the Philippines had been ravaged for 500 years by colonial powers, so the ransom was really war damage — and to feed back all of it without arguing. After a long, excruciating full summary, the sociopathic captor said 'that's right.' The ransom demand immediately collapsed from ten million to zero and was never raised again. The hostage later walked away, and weeks later the terrorist even called to say the negotiator was good enough to be promoted.
→ The ransom demand went from ten million to zero and the hostage was freed.
Coaching a vendor facing a customer demanding an undeserved refund, Voss had him summarize and express the customer's point of view. Early on Voss smelled that this counterpart wouldn't budge — 'this may be a guy you gotta shoot.' The summary didn't win the deal, but it still leveled the vendor out and took him out of anger, which Voss frames as the guaranteed payoff even when the other side won't move.
→ The summary didn't close the deal but steadied the negotiator and clarified the counterpart wouldn't move.
Common mistakes
Arguing with the justifications
The technique only works if you feed even the ridiculous justifications back without disputing them; arguing forfeits the 'that's right.'
Settling for 'you're right'
A dismissive 'you're right' is not the breakthrough; only 'that's right' signals they feel truly understood.
Is it for you?
Best for
High-stakes, stuck negotiations where the other side feels unheard and positions have hardened.
Not ideal for
Counterparts you have judged truly won't move, where the summary levels you out but won't close.
From the transcript
“the ability to articulate the other side's point of view in a way that they say that's right is the single biggest game changer”
“you will always be better off if you take the time to summarize the other side's perspective if only that it leveled you out”
From the episode
How To Negotiate Like An FBI Agent - Chris Voss - #237
Chris Voss